I Regret To Inform You...
"...That based on the number of spots we have available, the Admissions Committee has been unable to recommend to the Faculty of Arts that you be admitted to the Bachelor of Fine Arts program for the coming academic year 2016-2017."
These were the hardest words I have had to read this summer.
Disappointment overwhelmed me. I have always stood proudly beside my work and thought my skill was always more than enough.
Not this time, my pride, my ego, my very essence of creativity felt like dust in the wind.
"Hopefully next year." they said. My world shook, and I felt angry. How can I not be good enough? Why is my work not good enough? I'm... not good enough.
But I am good enough. More than enough. I was just up against a lot of competitive artists. And although I had nothing but A's in my studio classes, being judged by a panel of artists and non-artists, and not being selected was absolutely heart breaking.
I keep telling myself it happened for a reason that will make itself known soon. I keep telling myself that I know my worth, and that I am worthy of this program.
I will try again next year, and I will work dedicated to my craft until then. Pushing myself instead of letting this sense of rejection stop me from creating beautiful works of art. Nothing will stop me. They may have slowed me down in my goal to get a Fine Arts Degree, which I truly desire so I can proceed to a MFA, but I will always fight for what I believe in. And that is my ability to create.
I'll be using this loss to gain motivation, drive, and ambition into my pieces. Not to prove them wrong, because they might not be wrong. But to prove to myself that bitterness and being angry and stewing with the sense of rejection won't help me.
